Sunday, October 25, 2009

On Beauty

I'm hoping you won't hate me for this post. But it must be written, because my goal for this blog is full disclosure about what's going on in my head and my life (within reason!). So get over it and enjoy.

I am pretty. It's taken a lot of hits over the head to convince me of this fact. When I was in high school you could have yelled it in my face and I wouldn't have believed you. When I was in college and was literally told so on several occasions I started to wonder if it was true. Then I went to Japan where I was a giant, out-of-control, frizzy-haired monster; definitely not pretty. When we returned I got married, and the only thing that mattered to me was that my husband thought I was beautiful (awwwww! Stop that gagging!).

Now, at the Casino, something interesting is happening. I am one of the Beautiful People. Granted, it's not too difficult to attain this status when the casino-goers generally are missing teeth and/or limbs and carting their oxygen tanks around (I kid. But only a little). I think this is true because as I sing and dance through the Casino, people are constantly stopping to tell me so. It's quite nice, actually. Also, I noticed soon after arriving that when we all walked through the casino it was a little like this:

There's boys in there too, but that's the general reaction

It's a heady thing, being one of the Beautiful Ones.

Last night a friend and I went into one of the fancy restaurants for dessert after our shift. Usually when we go into this restaurant it's in costume and character, to sing to the clientele. As we walked up in our street clothes the staff oohed and ahhed about how different we looked. They immediately gave us a choice table. Everyone came over to visit and talk to the "real" us, from waiters to restaurant managers. Our waiter wouldn't let us pay for the dessert.

We were special. We were celebrities.

Would this have happened if we weren't pretty people? Maybe, because we're talented, too, and people love it when we sing. But I don't think it would be so easy to win people over. Beauty equals power. Being beautiful gives me a protective shield. People are kind. Doors open easily. If I would choose to, I could easily manipulate people. I'd like to think that I'm above this, but I'm probably not. I can get away with a lot if I just smile, and I probably have without thinking too much about it.

Don't hate me because I...actually wrote this post. I won't go there again, I promise, but I think beauty, sexuality, and power is an interesting topic. I wrote a whole paper about it last winter. If you're interested in further discussion, give me a shout-out!

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